It's Always The Darkest Before The Dawn

Tre and I have been having a hard time lately. My great grandmother is very very sick. It's hard to know that I can't drop everything to go see her. Tre ended up getting very sick as well.The depression from that ended up taking a toll on Tre and I's relationship for a while. I'm glad that we're working on getting better. Breaking up really isn't an option, because I refuse Anakin to grow up the way I did.

I have a lot of unresolved anger for the way that my Mom treated* me. I honestly feel like that will make me a better parent to Anakin, but I wish that I wasn't so angry. I hope that Anakin will have a good relationship with me, because I never got to have one with my mother because she had other priorities. 

I try to spend as much time with him as possible, that's why this blog can get neglected from time to time. I don't want working to be more important than my child. I love being silly with him. My favorite thing to do is to read to him and make crazy voices for the characters! It makes him laugh a lot. He likes when I lip sing songs to him as well.

There was a brief period where I stopped wearing my ring. But day by day, Tre and I get stronger.  We do yoga together and when Anakin is sleep, I try to listen to songs that make me happy, so I don't feel too sad. I know deep down that maybe this is the best thing for my grandmother, so she doesn't have to hurt anymore. How do you guys deal with sadness?

❤

*honestly treats, but whatever.