I have an obsession with Panera Bread. I'm so glad Tre showed me this place! I get happy every time we go, I'm so embarrassing. It's one of the first places we went together, so it always makes me think of happier times.
I'm not unhappy with my relationship at all. Tre is the best thing that has happened to me in a long time (so corny I know). But I am just unhappy in general. I have a pretty great life, so I'm always ashamed that I have depression. Some people have terrible life and my life consists of white girl problems. Once a year, it gets really really bad. Last year, it was after Tre came to visit me in school. Everything just seemed to go downhill for like three months.
People were...I can't even call it bullying, I was tormented in college. I didn't even want to leave my room because I was afraid of what would happen to me. Unfortunately, my room mate ended up being the worst. Dance was my only escape as usual. I was so happy to get out of New Mexico. But when I went to Vegas, people I considered closest to me ended up doing some not so good things. I had no choice but to move to Chicago ( & eventually Des Moines) with Tre. I hated being on the other side of the country. I didn't know anyone and I was soooooo allergic to Tre's cat!
                       
Most women go through what's called the "baby blues". Anakin makes me so happy, yet sad at the same time. My life is so different now. That makes me equally relieved and sad. Those feelings are constantly at war with each other. It will be interesting to see what emotion is dominant as time goes on.    
                     
I know that I have to be strong. For Anakin. He will not grow up like I did. I'm not only doing it for him, but for myself. I need to prove that a mother's love is an unbreakable bond.